Hi, I'm Pam, I weigh 258 pounds and I'm a size 18/20. I no longer weigh a staggering 302 pounds and I am no longer the largest size they carry at the Fat Lady's clothing store.
I'm trying to wrap my mind around these facts about me. I'm still 302 pounds in my head. I wonder if I always will be. I've heard other people who've lost weight say that they always feel fat not matter how much weight they lose. I guess after carrying around all this weight for all these years, I will have to remind myself that I am no longer that person.
I finally got to move the big weight on the scale!! I know, it's about time. But it felt good. It also felt good to try on a top that I bought a few weeks ago that was too small and have it fit. Size 18/20. I'm 18 pound away from being the weight I was when I met my husband 8 years ago. I was pretty happy at that weight but I know that it's not where I'm going to stop my weight loss journey. Once and for all, I want to be a "normal" weight. Not a thick chick weight or a slightly BBW weight, just an average weight. Not too big and not too small, just right. I would imagine that weight to be around 175 or 170 but I will only know when I get there.
For now, I am trying to wrap my mind around, to accept the fact that I am a healthy distance from 300 pounds and that the scale IS moving in the right direction every week. My second fill is coming up which will produce even more results. It's like, wow! this is really REALLY happening. In a blink of an eye it seems that I've lost a toddler!! 44 pounds. 44 pounds I'm not sorry to see go.
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3 comments:
Good on you for taking that step!
You've done so well.
The only way is down on the scales!
"May all your losses be inches and all your gains self esteem"
-bridget :0)
OMG I just have to tell you, as I was reading this I got a little teary eyed. I am so proud of you Pam. You are doing do awesome. You keep up the great work. BTW, it seems like I remember something about you saying that after you lose 50lbs, you were coming up here... Have you bought your ticket yet? LOL just kidding. But you know you (or you and the fam) are always welcome to come up anytime. We would LOVE it! And I love Bridget's last line so ditto that.
you're doing awesome and you look even better!!
~ we love Miss Maam
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